I need you

Now, did you read the news today?
Did they say that danger has gone away?
Cos from where I stand the fire is still lit
And it’s burning up into the night!
…
All my thousands dreams
Are haunted by a million screams
Fading into a billion streams!
Maybe I just have too many problems!
….
This is the time
I’m looking up to you for the future
Oh Christ, where are you now?
Cos everything’s gone wrong somehow!
…
I’m so confused
What should I do?
I can’t think of anything
Anything except you
I need you!

I had a dream

In my dreams life’s a book

Plain on the outside

Blank on the inside

With pages yet to be scripted

***
Our life’s the headline

So as we walk in the sunshine

Each one of lays out their storyline

Daily we write and lay out an outline

Our choices marks our lifeline

***
Every day’s like a new page

With it we set a new stage

Some can’t let go of their past age

Others worry about the future age

Mainly missing the present age

***
It’s all about grabbing each opportunity

So to fill this lil gap I saw in my society

I’m putting in my two cents of sobriety

Living my life like a pen from sun city

Shinning now cos soon this sun will set

Writing my story through songs and poems

I seek no political power

Just lyrical power

Armed with a mission is to inspire

To right some wrongs is what I desire

Do up until the last page of this column

When I’ll have to put this pen down

Learning

An old man once said that life is short
From then I chose to pay more attention
So I set myself on a quest to learn
I’m learning that I have so much to learn

I’m loud where I should be quiet
And quiet when I should be loud
I’m my own quantum of solace
So I’m learning how to whisper

When I have nothing to say
I’d rather just stay quiet
Maybe that’s what it means being an introvert
So I’m learning to be myself

I have a problem with trust
So how can I trust you?
When I don’t trust me!
So I’m learning to trust in God

God for a day

If you were God for a day

Would you make a world like this?

One where everything needs everything else

One where we all enter innocent

… bloody

… blameless and clueless

 

Would you create man …

Forty weeks in the making

Nine months undertaking

Would you give man so much freedom?

Bestow him with free will

Free to the extent that he can choose …

To believe in you

… Or not

Free enough to reject you

… to your face

Free to a point of being selfish

… man eat man society

Where the rich gets richer

And the poor man has no one to feed him

 

Would you make rivers flow

… from mountains downstream

Only for man to polute them

Deposit industrial waste in your streams

Then place the blame on you

… for cholera, typhoid, dysentery 

for all his poor choices

… the consequences

 

If you were God for a day

Would the devil freely roam?

Would hurricanes be

How about earthquakes

… landslides

… farmine

… deseases

… drought

 

Would you give you own life

For an evil generation?

See your own creation crucify you like a crook

Like a sheep watch ’em lead you to the slaughter

Despice you, reject you, esteem you not?

Would you be wounded for their crimes?

Crushed for their iniquities

Labelled a man of sorrows

 

Would you call them your children?

Friends maybe?

Branches stemming from you?

Justified and redeemed?

More than conquerors?

Heirs with you son?

Would you call them saints?

A new creation?

Holy and blameless?

If you were God for a day

Would you save mankind?

Self talk

I find it healthy to convesate with myself…
Through it I deal with voices in my head
From the choices that I dreaded choosing
To being able to see my life flash Infront of my eyes
I see how my lust for cars, cash, and worldly stuff has had me suffer and my scars run deep ..
And the system’s still applying more pressure
At quiet times I contemplated giving up
Even toyed around with suicidal thoughts
But I’ve got mad dreams, kids and bills
So I run to what I know
My pen is my ecstasy
So I scribble my fears on plain white sheets
I wipe my tattooed tears on white napkins
I drown it all the best way I know how to
With words on my pad I puff it all away
I remind myself that I owe it to mysey to never make the same mistakes
Moving with a change of pace,
In my head I’m a fighter,
My words sparks up the lighter
My soul is a fluid
My load is getting lighter
Another peaceful moment is lost,
But I still need to be straight
I say to myself, son, take one deep breath,
Down on one knee,
I whisper a simple prayer to my God
Thanks for this far
Please forgive me for my life of sin
I beg for Thy forgiveness
I’m back on the right track, I’m finally found!

@muchendujnr

Dream

If this is truly a dream
Then I don’t wanna wake up
Cos if I’m ever free
It’s only in my dreams
Only there I’m I poor bastard
That has so much to offer
It’s only there that this pain stops
And I get to really live
It’s only there that
I get to meet my private self
I get to see the child inside me dance
I get to ride wild horses
So let me and my dreams be,
Cos it does me more good than I’d ever say
It helps me live
It makes my broken heart whole
It seals my wounds
It covers all my scars
But I never forget
This is just but a temporary loan

@muchendujnr

A woman

I write about what I see

I write about what I feel

I write about what it is

And what I think it ought to be

Simply put, I’ve been doing my thing

…

I’ll never understand what it is to be a woman

I sure can’t walk in her shoes

Cos all I know is the weight of the cross in my pants

All I can is look at the world through her eyes

Cos when I look through her mirror

She’s more than I can see

And the world gets less dimmer

…

I never knew being a woman

Comes with so much pain and gain

So I’m letting it get to my brain

Letting it get the best of my cerebrum

Maybe then, I can explain

…

My kind says you need to conform

I say transform!

After all you’re a woman!

Can’t help but wonder who’s more Herculean?

The stoic man or the crying woman?

Who has the upper hand?

…

So I write to father’s with daughters

Don’t teach her to do just what she’s told

Teach her to be herself cos God doesn’t make carbon copies

As she balances her weight on stilettos

Let her not do it blindly

Let her break the barriers!

Cos once she gets through

As much is it’s a man’s world …

The world is less scarier!

I
At times I wonder if you’re real?
Or should I look for somebody else?
Are you really who you say you are?
That you’re able to do exceedingly, abundantly, above and beyond ..
Much more than I can ask?
Much more than I can think?

II
If you are, I wonder if it’s true …
That you know where I am?
That you actually see it
That you see every step I take?
How about the ones I took backwards?
Or the tears that we muffled by this pillow?

III
If it’s really true then I’ll let you in on my truth
I fear that you’re mad at me
Cos you’ve broken me on every side that I go
If you’re not how comes …
That it’s only trouble that finds me?
When I hoped for good, evil came
When I waited for light, all was dark

IV
But then again
Though you slay me,
You still remain my hope
Though I’m flat on my back
It allows me to reflect and look up to you
And I’m able to see you for myself
And I’m reminded that it all works together for my good!

@muchendujnr

I’m trying

I am capable of anything and everything

I only need to put my mind to it

My days are full of daydreams and optimism

I desire to see things adjust in a health manner

I try to keep up but it ain’t painless

I hope that he sees that I am trying

muchendu

This is for all the times …

I let you push me around

I let you keep me down

I listened to you lies

I watched as you walked all over me

I made excuses for your conduct

I was afraid to make a single sound

I cried myself to sleep

I failed to clean out my closet

I was terrified to let you down

I broke my neck to give you perfectness

I wasted over half my life pleasing you

 

This is for all the times …

You said I’ll never make it

You said that I’ll never amount to anything

You told me to keep my mouth shut

You had my back up against the wall

You fed my fears and let them control me

You filled my stomach with butterflies

You put your hands on me

You stripped me of all confidence

You gave me nightmares

You wrote a list of those who matter but left me

 

Here I am and I will not run

Everything I was afraid to say I’m not afraid to say no more

Though my faith is riding on a string

I know it’s not too late for me to start over

The rage is gone and your lights are out

I’ve made a tight rope out of twine

Funny thing though, I don’t hate you

My shoulders no longer carry your weight

I’ve forgiven you

But I did it for me!

@scmuchendu